2/25/2010

"Free Tili?" Not on My Watch (Satire)

A killer whale kills a trainer at SeaWorld and people want it freed back into the wild? Able to roam the great seas as he pleases; free to kill again if he so chooses? What kind of example does this set for the other whales? Kill a human and get liberated from captivity? I don't think so.

I understand the marine park pool is not the natural habit of "Tilikum" and his kind, so it may only be natural for an ornery orca to lash out every now and again. But by now all marine animals should understand: This world was designed specifically for humans; and if you live in our world, you play by our rules.

When we say "Jump through the hoop!" you ask "How high?" (answer: "Just high enough to get through the hoop will do"). When we say "Splash the audience!" you ask "How much?" (answer: "Just enough to make them giggle and consider buying a SeaWorld t-shirt"). Then you may be fed.

So a murder of this barbaric nature (with hundreds of eye witnesses) is way out of line and deserves justice. Rather than releasing Tilikum, I say we throw him in an even smaller tank. Instead of three buckets of herring a day, he gets one. No direct interaction with humans or other whales. Place his tank in the corner of the larger whale tank so the other whales can see: "This is what happens when you mess with the humans. Anyone else wanna show off your brute strength?" Didn't think so.

And I would probably show leniency if this were a natural occurence ("after all, killer whales will be killer whales," some may say), but we're dealing with a repeat offender here. This recent death at SeaWorld Orlando was the third human death Tilikum was involved in. Certainly the track record of a maliciously murderous mammal.

We need not only continue our containment of these marine animals, but clamp down even tighter. We need more marine parks, more shows and expansion into other industries (casinos, restaurants, sporting events, etc.). Eventually these beasts will realize their primary purpose on this planet: entertain humans so we may swim in a sea of money.

1 comments:

  1. For the record, I am not actually anti-SeaWorld. I understand their staff and trainers care very deeply for these animals and are not intending to exploit them. They do a very good job of educating people and creating interest in marine animals. This often leads people to interest in conservatism efforts for these animals and other marine life.

    It is there that SeaWorld draws criticism. Apparently rather than directly encouraging or funding conservatism efforts, they are more worried about their bottom line. And ultimately, the animal activists point is the truth: they belong in their natural habitat. Free Tili!

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